as for right now

this is my last horrah. (sp?)

so i'm sitting on my coveted plastic wrap bed after moving all my boxes out of my room. i am done.

school's been finished since last wednesday and from last wednesday to this past saturday... i have been carelessly drinking nonstop. its great. really. but this last week also has a different ultimatum to it all.

yes, last year, i moved out of marlton and i had to "move out" of my apt for a bit and everything interlinks in some sort of way but this year is by far much more different. first and foremost. i am moving out of my apartment. the same apartment that i pulled consecutive all nighters in, smoked outside the fire escape, where i've come back and hated, clogged the bathroom sinks, and the same apartment that i've made some new friends.

im going to miss my apartment. but most importantly. im going to miss my friends. but more importantly. the one going to paris.

i guess thats what makes everything so different. one's own attachment to certain people and things. i've grown to this apartment and it sucks because just after i've gotten so used to everything, i leave. Also, stacey's moving to paris... and thats HUGE. thats crazy. i really don't know what i'm going to do without her here in new york city, because god forbid, i don't even know how i'm going to make it without her.

things are changing rapidly and for the first time in my life. i don't want to leave new york city for an infinite amount of reasons. i dont think i have ever expected myself to actually say this but i'm going to really miss it..

i mean ok. im not leaving for like 30 years. but its just i know for a fact that after i do come back, everything is going to be different and im going to miss everything that is occuring right now. the lifestyle i guess.

it really sucks.

well. the movers are coming in a bit and i must go take a shower and prep myself to carrying 5,000 pound boxes down our five flights of stairs (thats what im not going to miss).

peace, love, and i dont know.

tiffa.